Humans, oh so stupid hunmas..

Why does people in this world feel a need to make everything so god damn confusing and complicated. Us humans are so fucked up. For real though, why can't we just treat each other like we wanna be treated? Why cant we just fucking think about others than our self? We talk shit about each other and get pissed if others do about us. why can't we just realize that NOBODY is perfect, not even that one person we look up to the most. all humans, also your idol, makes mistakes. It’s just a part of life, we learn from it so why can't we just fucking move on? Humans are fucking stupid, I am too. I keep going back to you even though you treated me like shit. But then again, you did treat me good too. You did make me laugh, you made me happy. So maybe I’m not that fucked up. I'm just trying to be happy, have fun, live while I’m young.  My question just is if it would make me happy to go back to you..?

Why is it that we cant just fall in love once, and then stay in love with that one person. Then of course the other person would fall in love with you too., so there wouldn’t be any heartburns.

You can say what you want, you can do whatever. But I won’t let you get away with hurting me like you did. If you really want me back you gotta show me you actually mean it. 

- CS.

Over him!

I am so happy to say that I am over it

I am over him and his stupid games

I shall not go back to him

He does not deserve it, and I

I deserve better, I deserve to be treated good

It’s a nice feeling to finally be able to tell myself that I won’t go back to him

And I really hope it won’t change, that I wont change my mind again

Because I know it is stupid

I know I would be a goddamn fool to go back to him

But I cannot ignore the little voice in my head telling me that I easily could go back

Go back to being hopelessly in love with a jerk, an idiot.

A player that is what he is

I know that for sure and the stupid ting is that deep down I knew it from the start

I should start listening more to my brain

But then again, I don’t regret what was between us

Actually I Ioved it

And as cheesy as it sounds, you only live once so why not live my life and have fun?

But I should not go back

Cause he’s an asshole, a freaking man whore

And I can find better

I do not need him to be happy

and yes, he did make me happy, but he also made my cry

- CS

You...

You are…

Arrogant

Boastful

Callous

Careless

Cowardly

Cruel

Deceitful

Dishonest

Foolish

Irresponsible

Mean

Nasty

Patronizing

Perverse

Rude

Ruthless

Secretive

Selfish

Self-centered

Stupid

Thoughtless

Untrustworthy

Vain

Cocky

Dumb

You are a…

Jerk

Bitch

Idiot

Man whore

Player

Fool

Dumbass

Creep

Asshole

Pig

Bastard

Shit

Ass

Blockhead

Dunce

Dummy

Jackass

Twit

Weirdo

Loon

Dork

Jock

Loser

Dick

Faggot

- CS

Tattooed to my heart

Like a tattoo, I will always have you.

But I can cover you up with another tattoo.

- CS

Pathetic

You know what?

I think I am starting to get over you

I can now tell you that if you don’t show me something new soon

I will forget about you

I did not think it was possible

I did not see it coming

But right now I am just so sick and tired of your games

I am done being played and left alone feeling stupid

I still wonder where we stand

I still want to know

We need to talk, I know you know that just as well as I do

I am just not sure if you think it is necessary

Do you have any idea how much you hurt me?

I told my sister not to worry

She told me to make sure you would not hurt me before I let you too close

I did not tell her how you had already broken my heart

People warned me about you and I did not listen to them

I liked you, I really like you for your personality

I just wish you would say the same about me

I have no idea what you think about me

That I am pathetic?

- CS

Love isn't always what you think

Love isn’t always what you think

You think he is worth your time

You think he deserve you heart

You hope he’ll pay you back with his own

Is it really worth trying?

When all you think of is that one person

Even though you don’t know what he is think of

Even though he “can’t” hang out

Is it worth waiting for him to realize you need more

More than whatever It is he is giving

or, What he is not giving

- CS

IS THAT SO?

Do you still like me?

Am I still the one you want?

If we were sat in your car and you were dropping me off, would we be about to kiss?

Do you think of me as I think of you?

- CS

I AM SO STUPID

So guess what? The jerk talked to me today. He said “what’s up, Caroline” as he walked past me in the hallways. I stood by my locker as his stupid walking past my back. Turning my head I heard my voice speak a simple “hey” as his black eye moved down the hall towards his own locker. In my mind I was freaking out. I didn’t know what to do, or what to say. I wanted to ignore him, be hardcore, play hard to get. But that, my friend, is not my style I guess. Not around him at least. As soon as he gives me the slightest bit of attention I am hooked again. I am so stupid!

And guess what? I asked him if he could hang out some time soon. He said he didn’t know because wrestling season was starting. Surprising answer right there! not. I just wish I knew what is going on. No, I wish nothing was. I wish everything was as before. I wish he was mine, and mine alone. I wish I was his. I want to be able to kiss him, touch him, feel him, breath. But I want to smack him, hard. Make him hurt as much as I do. My eyes are still tearing up all the time. They long after him every time he is near. I catch myself looking for him constantly. It’s stupid. This day is stupid. I am so stupid!

- CS

I don't know what I know

I know you were more than happy the first time we kissed cause you tweeted about it

I know you liked the kisses that we shared cause you wouldn’t let me go

I know you liked spending time with me cause you kept asking me out

I know I meant something to you cause you showed up at places you wouldn’t normally go, to see me

I know you thought about me all the time cause you contacted me constantly

I know you wanted to know everything about me cause you kept asking me questions about me

But I don’t know what happened

I don’t know why you have no interest in me anymore

I don’t know why you keep lying to me

I don’t know why you are leading me on, not caring anymore

I don’t know why you felt the need to replace me with her

I don’t know why you’re ignoring me all of a sudden

I don’t know why you don’t appreciate me anymore

I don’t know how we went from talking constantly to almost not at all

I don’t know why or how I lost you

I don’t even know if I did lose you

But I know that you hurt me and that I want you anyway.

- CS

Can we go back?

Can we go back to that night we first met?

I really liked that night,

I wanna live it again.

Meet you for the very first time again.

Not that I wanna change anything.

I just wanna live it again,

Cause it was so very wonderful.

Wonderful, to meet somebody as sweet as you.

So can we go back?

- CS

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is what I am looking forward to

Tomorrow is what is making me nervous

It is what makes butterflies take over my stomach

It is what makes me smile.

I cannot wait for tomorrow to come

But at the same time I am scared

I am nervous

But I cannot wait.

I do not think I will get any sleep tonight

I will be wondering about that day

That day that will be tomorrow

And I will be thinking about you.

- CS

Disappointed.

I am disappointed.

I know I should not be,

But I just am.

I am very disappointed!

Am I mean to say I am disappointed?

I mean,

Others did worse!

I should probably be happy,

But I just am not.

I cannot stop thinking about it though.

It is on my mind nonstop.

I wish I had acted differently,

Done something that would change

The situation I am in now.

But I did not,

And now I am disappointed.

Of myself.

- CS

You

I like your smile

It is cute

Your red cheeks

They are adorable

I think I like you

I like your name

I like saying it

Again and again

It is like sweet music to me

And I love music

I like your sweet texts

They make me smile

A lot

I think I am starting to like you

Like really

I think you like striped shirts

You have worn striped shirts every time I have seen you

Maybe it is just a coincidence

Maybe not

But you did in fact look great

I would like to meet up again

To see that cute smile of yours

And those red cheeks

I know I like you

I know I like you a lot

- CS

The one that got away

We were sitting against the wall. His right arm was wrapped around me holding me close to him and keeping me warm. My head was in the crack of his neck, resting against his shoulder. My lips touched the skin behind his ear and sometimes his ear lope as I spoke. His fingers were going up and down on my arm, caressing me lovingly. My eyes were closed, I felt so tired. But in that moment, all I wanted was to sit there with him. To talk silently while we kept each other warm. To hold each other. The feeling of my lips meeting his soft skin. The feeling of his fingers playing softly on my arm. To hear his raspy voice speak so low only I could hear it. His left hand found mine and we entwined our fingers. Our fingers played with each other in a slow pace. All we did was sit there and talk about everything and nothing. To caress each other in the most loving, caring and wonderful way. To keep each other warm and awake.

He moved his head so that he was facing me. He looked into my eyes quickly before closing them and leaning his head closer to mine. Our lips met and a passionate kiss began. Our mouths moved in sync as we kissed each other deeply. Forgetting everything about the people around us. Suddenly we were the only ones there, everyone else faded away. Our tongues met again and again as our hands held each other’s faces. None of us wanted to pull away. We didn’t even think about pulling away, before somebody spoke that is. I pulled away and leaned my head against his shoulder. My heart was racing. I was wet around my mouth, but I dint mind it. I could still feel his lips against mine, I could still feel his mouth moving in sync with mine. I wanted to kiss him again, but I didn’t do it.

We stood in the dark, in a shadow from a big tree. People were near but we didn’t see them. We talked like never before. My arms wrapped around his neck hugging him tight. His arms went around my waist keeping me close to him. My head was leaned against his warm chest as we kept on talking silently. We heard somebody ask who was snogging, but we ignored them. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to feel his soft plump lips against mine just one more time. But I was too insecure. So I hugged him instead. And told him I would miss him.

- CS