Lost again

He was the first one to really break my heart. He treated me like shit and I know I deserve better, but something in me keeps wanting him. The last couple of months I have been telling myself I was over it, over him, and the last weeks I actually believed it, but my old feelings for him are coming back, and I hate it. Being at that place, at that house that reminded me so much of him only made it worse. And now that he is actually contacting me, I am lost again.

- CS

Too many feelings in it?

I wish you would see what a cute couple we would be.

People ask me all the time what is between us,

I never know what to tell them

But they always tell me we would look cute together

They say we are perfect for each other.

People keep telling me to invite you to the dance

I just say I might

But really I can’t figure out if I want to or not

It's not that I’m afraid you will say no, okay a little

It's that I don’t really think you deserved to be asked.

You should be begging by my feet

You should be letting me know that you really care

And if you don’t, then let me know that instead of leding me on

I don’t wanna do this anymore if you’re gonna hurt me again

I’m here to have fun, I know I can have fun with you, but is there too many feelings in it?

- CS

Can we go back?

Can we go back to that night we first met?

I really liked that night,

I wanna live it again.

Meet you for the very first time again.

Not that I wanna change anything.

I just wanna live it again,

Cause it was so very wonderful.

Wonderful, to meet somebody as sweet as you.

So can we go back?

- CS

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is what I am looking forward to

Tomorrow is what is making me nervous

It is what makes butterflies take over my stomach

It is what makes me smile.

I cannot wait for tomorrow to come

But at the same time I am scared

I am nervous

But I cannot wait.

I do not think I will get any sleep tonight

I will be wondering about that day

That day that will be tomorrow

And I will be thinking about you.

- CS

The one that got away

We were sitting against the wall. His right arm was wrapped around me holding me close to him and keeping me warm. My head was in the crack of his neck, resting against his shoulder. My lips touched the skin behind his ear and sometimes his ear lope as I spoke. His fingers were going up and down on my arm, caressing me lovingly. My eyes were closed, I felt so tired. But in that moment, all I wanted was to sit there with him. To talk silently while we kept each other warm. To hold each other. The feeling of my lips meeting his soft skin. The feeling of his fingers playing softly on my arm. To hear his raspy voice speak so low only I could hear it. His left hand found mine and we entwined our fingers. Our fingers played with each other in a slow pace. All we did was sit there and talk about everything and nothing. To caress each other in the most loving, caring and wonderful way. To keep each other warm and awake.

He moved his head so that he was facing me. He looked into my eyes quickly before closing them and leaning his head closer to mine. Our lips met and a passionate kiss began. Our mouths moved in sync as we kissed each other deeply. Forgetting everything about the people around us. Suddenly we were the only ones there, everyone else faded away. Our tongues met again and again as our hands held each other’s faces. None of us wanted to pull away. We didn’t even think about pulling away, before somebody spoke that is. I pulled away and leaned my head against his shoulder. My heart was racing. I was wet around my mouth, but I dint mind it. I could still feel his lips against mine, I could still feel his mouth moving in sync with mine. I wanted to kiss him again, but I didn’t do it.

We stood in the dark, in a shadow from a big tree. People were near but we didn’t see them. We talked like never before. My arms wrapped around his neck hugging him tight. His arms went around my waist keeping me close to him. My head was leaned against his warm chest as we kept on talking silently. We heard somebody ask who was snogging, but we ignored them. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to feel his soft plump lips against mine just one more time. But I was too insecure. So I hugged him instead. And told him I would miss him.

- CS

Let us talk

Can we talk about you

And a bit about me

Maybe about us?

I would like that

No, I would love that.

You could tell me about yourself

I could tell you about me

You know,

I even want to hear the things you have already told me

I just want to talk

I do not care if you think you are boring

I do not think so

I think you are god damn interesting.

Yep, that is what you are

Interesting.

Let us talk

Let us get to know each other better than we already do

Let us find out what we have in common

Let us just talk,

Forever.

- CS

Please.

Please tell me what this is.

Please let me know what you are feeling.

Please tell me if I am stuck in your head.

Cause you are stuck in mine.

Please help me figure this out.

Show me the truth.

Please tell me you like me,

But tell me in what way.

How fast can you fall in love?

Do you know that?

Were you in love before?

Or after? Are you in love now?

Please give me love.

I cannot play hide and seek with love anymore.

Please tell me to leave you the f alone,

Or tell me to stay.

Please tell me what I need.

Cause I do not know.

Please show me.

Please give it to me.

- CS

Kiss.

Kiss me like you wanna be loved.

Cause I do.

Do you?

I want you.

I kissed you.

You kissed me.

And I have never felt something better

Than the feeling of kissing you.

I want to feel your soft plump lips again.

I cannot get them out of my mind.

I do not know if it is crazy,

But I think the kiss made me fall in love with you.

I asked you if you regret it,

You said there was no reason to.

Did you mean that?

Did you mean it when you said I was really sweet?

The kiss is all I think about.

And you.

How about you?

What do you think about?

- CS

Uno

No, I'm not Spanish. I am a dane (from Denmark) but I am an exchange student in America (Link). Basically this blog will be all my toughts and feeling put down to words. I have a thing with writing down what I feel.. So I figured, why not share it.

I am a dreamer, I follow my dreams and one of the most important things to me, other than the people i care for, is to be true to myself. 

"Be a true heart not a follower." - Ed Sheeran.

 I haven't been through the worst thing, I've had my heart broken and I have broken another heart, but my brain is a place filled with thoughts and feels and it has helped me to put it down and read other peoples words. So here you go, follow my life in the form of poems and whatever I might end up posting here.

Enjoy.

- CS